Milo’s Lowest Moments

Sometimes my dog is really bad. Sometimes this results in damage to my property. A few weeks ago I left Milo downstairs while I went upstairs to do some studying. (Remember, I’m in med school, I should be doing this all the time). I want to estimate that Milo was out of my sight for an hour, maybe an hour and a half. He can USUALLY handle this much alone time but on this particular day the doggie voices on his shoulder told him to eat my rug! Michael and I have speculated on why he thought the rug was edible.

  1. It looks like grass and sometimes grass is tasty
  2. There was residual rawhide and it was tasty
  3. He had at some point thrown up rawhide, and the remnants were tasty

Anyway, he meticulously devoured a circle of our shag rug and piled the left-overs next to the hole. He could be an engineer!

BAD DOG

HIs daddy was not pleased!

Fast forward to this morning. Michael leaves for work around 6 am, and from then to when I wake up Milo usually has run of the house. (note that during the night he is in bed with us, under the covers, don’t judge!) I opened our bedroom door this morning at 7 to see a neat surprise! It was a plastic bag with some breadcrumbs around it! Hmmm….. was this some sort of offering from the breakfast fairies???

I followed the path of bread crumbs downstairs. From my forensic analysis I have deduced that at some point between 6 and 7 am this morning, the 27th of September, Milo the dog leapt onto the dining room table and pilfered some sliced bread. A minor offense, but there is more to this case.

Reading the bread crumb evidence I could follow Milo’s tracks. He ate as much as his naughty stomach could hold, ran a victory-lap around the table, and then made his way to the living room. Milo has documented squirrel-tendencies. Much like with his treats and bones, he hid little pieces of bread in every nook of our couch and love seat. Between EVERY cushion there was a nibble of bread! And that leaves a big mess! Is Milo preparing for the apocalypse? I don’t have time for that.

He knows he did wrong.

3 thoughts on “Milo’s Lowest Moments

  1. Dr. PP – If I could take a moment and express to you that you need doggy therapy. It goes without saying that Milo is completely undisciplined and therefore who is to blame for the transgressions of the puppy-child? The parents! Just sayin’ 😀 LOVE LOVE LOVE

  2. Milo was just concerned about your preparations for the zombie apocalpyse and didn’t think you were hoarding enough food. When Dec. 21st rolls around you’re going to be greatful for his food storing habits.

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