This is Weasley. Weasley is a fat cat.
Like millions of American cats, Weasley leads a sedentary lifestyle. This is exaccerbated by his parents naive belief that his extra poundage is benign “fluff”.
Milo wants to help Weasley get healthy so he lets Weasley “chase” him around his apartment! In this ideal interval training, Weasley alternates between rapid sprints and lunges for toning.
What can I say? My dog is a philanthropist.
I have weird dreams when I’m under stress. The night before taking my MCAT I dreamt that I had to input all of my answers into my grandma’s head. Like if I pushed a certain spot in her cranium it meant the answer choice “D”. I found this extra hilarious because by the time I entered medical school my grandma was so senile she asked me if I could deliver her babies!
Last night’s REM sleep was a doozy! It started out in the medical school elevator. I pushed a floor and it started to move but the doors didn’t close and then it turned sideways and everyone fell against the wall!
Later Michael brought me to one of his friend’s houses and it turned out to be Owen Wilson who told me he liked my swimsuit! I told Owen he should fix the elevator. Because Owen Wilson owns the school elevators. In their bathroom I found a case of Zyrtec that cost $6,500. They are so rich! We went out with the Wilson’s and luckily I had both a Kate Spade purse and a MacBook Air to prove that I was on a similar socioeconomic level.
Then I woke up.
Yesterday morning Michael and I took a trip to the fine arts museum! It’s sad that this is the first time we’ve gone since living here because we are only about 2 miles from the museum district.
We saw a war photograph exhibit that spanned centuries, all the way up to detailed photos of the Iraqi war. It was educational, moving, sad, discouraging, and enlightening. I definitely recommend it but not for the little ones…. and maybe bring your tissues??
And then we traipsed on over the contemporary art museum. Where things got weird. Real weird.
Please oh please someone with an art background explain to me why a video of a maggot is featured in a museum!! Or a toilet on a pile of newspapers surrounded by ketchup bottles and milk jugs. ENLIGHTEN ME!!! WHAT CAN IT MEAN?! I don’t know if you can tell but the confusion really got to me, because as we all know, I am trying to up my hipness. And what is hipper than a modern art museum?? I know! A food truck!!!
This bad boy really rounded out our hipster morning. I had never eaten at one before and I felt like a much cooler person… instantly.
I got the Chicken Tikka Tacos because indian food is my jam! DELISH! Go get you some.
Here follows the as-promised advice to the future bride, groom, and random passer by.
To the asker:
- Listen to me because I am always right.
- Your soon-to-be fiancé would much rather a close up photo of the magical moment than it be a surprise shot from the woods…. 50 yards away. Even if she pinned it on pinterest. EVEN THEN.
- Don’t panic about her outfit. Even if her mother insisted that she be in a dress. EVEN THEN.
- Apparently you aren’t supposed to wear suspenders with a belt….. who knew?
To the rando:
- Why on earth would you even think about getting in front of a photo of two people getting engaged on a bridge??? What is wrong with you???? Unless you are on your way to save a life in the med center (which I highly doubt you snarky man on a bike) just wait the 30 seconds to pass by.
To the askee:
- Listen to me because I am always right.
- If you suspect a proposal is in your near future (like within 6 months) do ANYTHING anyone asks you to do. Even if you think seeing a movie with me and Michael is the most boring thing in the world (it is because I usually fall asleep) do it anyway.
- Just wear a dress and heels with full make up and your nails done and a tiara from when you wake up to when you go to sleep.
- Don’t invite my mom and I to go dress shopping with you. Because we will take photos like this:
I’ve entitled these “when white trash visits a fancy bridal boutique”
My last post about Milo in clothing was met with some really positive support for dog outfits. Several people suggested that he needs EVEN MORE clothes including possibly some lounge wear or a rain jacket. For those of you who disagreed…. what can I say? Haters gonna hate!
Today while Milo and I were at Petsmart we stumbled upon a diamond in the rough of clearance pet clothes! While he does sometimes like to be preppy, today Milo was channeling his inner bad boy biker so we just had to pick up this distressed jean vest…. for $4! STEAL!
“Where’s my Harley?” -Milo
This weekend was very special because our best friends Colby and Tanner got engaged!!! And guess who was an integral part of the surprise and kept her mouth shut even though she has multiple times been accused of being a blabber mouth???!? DOCTOR PP THAT’S WHO! (was that a run on sentence?)
A future post will be about how to get surprise engaged and plan a surprise engagement without annoying everyone around you (TANNER!) but until then let me leave you with this little nugget: if you EVER think a proposal is in your future and someone suggests putting a dress on, just do it. (JK Colbs you looked beautiful as always duhhh why are you so cute)
Tanner got ready at our house and looked like precious. I made the signs that would line the pathway to the bridge. Milo napped. Michael showed off his bow tie expertise.
So the ruse was that the four of us were going out to dinner and dancin’ and they would come to our place early to watch our wedding video. Around 5:00 Michael got a phone call from Megan , also our photographer extraordinaire, that her sink had exploded! OH NO! The boys went off to “fix the sink” AKA set up for the amazing proposal while Colby and I watched some Dance Moms. Quality television to prepare for engagement time! Once I got the text I said “omg Colby let’s go walk Milo before the boys get back to we will be all ready to go”! We headed to the bridge and luckily Milo was having some sort of asthma attack which kept her distracted.
SURPRISE COLBY AREN’T YOU SO PROUD OF ME FOR KEEPING THIS SECRET?!
Michael and I have been on the look out for a piece of furniture to store our nice glasses (we have many) and Milo’s stuff (even more). Last week I stumbled upon the perfect thing, at a resale shop!!! The $20 price tag made it even better! Michael didn’t necessarily agree because he can sometimes be a snot bucket. (sorry hunny)
I don’t always ask for his permission so today while he was at work my mom and I spruced it up in our garage. Incidentally not asking Michael’s permission is how we came to be Milo’s parents! So obviously I am a great decision maker. OBVIOUSLY.
$20 for the piece, another $20 for spray paint, and $16 for new hardware, what a deal!
As you can see Milo is an extraordinary helper and craftsman. Until he started breathing in the paint fumes and trying to chew his way out of the leash…. then he had to go back inside.
Michael hasn’t seen it yet and is on his way home now! I hope he likes it! If not, anyone in the market for a renovated buffet??